These past few weeks have felt like a whirlwind. So much preparation has gone into this move that it feels so weird to not have one million things to do anymore. Jay did such a great job organizing the business side of things, and that took months of planning on his end. This move felt like moving x5. All the shit that you end up throwing in a box cause you don't know what to do with it had to be dealt with before we left. Our storage unit is a lot more full than we thought it would be but we still did pretty well. Three pieces of furniture and 11 regular size storage bins later, our whole loot of worldy possessions are sitting inside of Stow Away Storage.
The night before we moved was so, so, so hard. We had all of our close friends come by for a lovely dinner catered by Phoenicia thanks to the Kivetts. Hanging out was fun, but knowing all the little things we had to do kept us a bit distracted. After everyone left was so stressful because we finalized all of our packing only to realize that all of our bags were over the 50lb weight limit. Mind you all of our stuff was already in storage so we no longer had bins to throw stuff in or any reasonable means to take care of these loose ends. At 1 in the morning it felt like the world was ending. We were so exhausted and emotionally drained from all of the goodbyes. In the end I got about 3 hours of sleep and Jay got about 2.
I saved the worst part for last. I was dreading, absolutely dreading, saying goodbye to Juliana. All of the goodbyes sucked a bit, but this one was the worst. Well, maybe it ties with saying goodbye to my mom at the airport. I'd been trying to prep myself for it for weeks but I knew nothing would make it better. I did ok during the actual goodbye part, but when she closed her car door and they were about to drive off I felt like someone punched me in the stomach and I didn't even want to stand. Poor Jay was standing there with me as I bawled. It's not that I felt like I wouldn't see her again, it was the companionship and everyday things I was going to miss. The idea of not seeing her and Scarlet about every two days is just unfathomable. God I miss her already. Saying goodbye to my mom and sister was really hard. Luckily they were short goodbyes cause otherwise I might not have survived them.
This time in Pennsylvania is going by dreadfully slow. We geared up for all these goodbyes and this new adventure and then there's this lull before all that actually happens. It's funny because I already feel like I'm in a foreign place. Our propensity for drinking coffee and eating vegan food and pretty much anything normal that we did is not received well here. I guess I better get used to it. I'm looking forward to Wednesday, it looks like my dream will come true afterall and we will go to New York city before we fly out. It is still undecided exactly where we will stay, but if my instinct serves me correctly I envision a trip to Red Bamboo and some great coffee in our future. Hallelujah! I could use something to cheer myself up.
Monday, August 2, 2010
Thursday, June 3, 2010
2 Months and Counting
A lot of people ask me if this time is flying by, but really it isn't. Perhaps if I had a lot going on, like Jay, I would feel that way. There hasn't been a whole lot of progress in terms of preparing to leave. We did find a really cool language program to help us learn some Czech words. It has some games and it associates every word with a picture so it's much easier to learn than just writing out words on flash cards. I do, however, need to seriously kick it into gear if I expect to be able to survive in the next 2 months. I know that they speak a lot of English out there so I'm sure we'd be fine, but with the way my husband likes to talk to people I'm sure we'll need more than a few Czech words.
Lately I've been trying to concentrate on really taking in and being appreciative of each phase of life that I'm going through. For instance, we just celebrated our second year of marriage. It struck me that we would never go through the newness of marriage in the same way as these last two years. We won't ever go back to the first apartment we had together, or figure out how to sleep comfortably in the same bed. We won't plan our first trip out of the country. It makes me feel grateful for this time even when I feel like I'm ready for the next thing. Jay and I both have this sense that this phase in our lives, living in Redlands and working locally, is something that we won't ever come back to. Not that we won't ever live in Redlands again. I think the permanency of this place as "home" will not change. We will gravitate toward this place in waves but we both know we are meant for something different.
We're coming up to our 6th month living at my mom's house and it's been so much easier than I expected. I'm not sure how we would have been able to prepare for this trip without this opportunity. It looks like we will be able to stay here until we leave or very close to the date of departure. Such a relief! It looks like we also have our first two visitors lined up for the end of summer/fall. It's hard to picture what it will be like during that time but I'm so stoked at the possibility of seeing friends in Europe! Na shledanou!
Lately I've been trying to concentrate on really taking in and being appreciative of each phase of life that I'm going through. For instance, we just celebrated our second year of marriage. It struck me that we would never go through the newness of marriage in the same way as these last two years. We won't ever go back to the first apartment we had together, or figure out how to sleep comfortably in the same bed. We won't plan our first trip out of the country. It makes me feel grateful for this time even when I feel like I'm ready for the next thing. Jay and I both have this sense that this phase in our lives, living in Redlands and working locally, is something that we won't ever come back to. Not that we won't ever live in Redlands again. I think the permanency of this place as "home" will not change. We will gravitate toward this place in waves but we both know we are meant for something different.
We're coming up to our 6th month living at my mom's house and it's been so much easier than I expected. I'm not sure how we would have been able to prepare for this trip without this opportunity. It looks like we will be able to stay here until we leave or very close to the date of departure. Such a relief! It looks like we also have our first two visitors lined up for the end of summer/fall. It's hard to picture what it will be like during that time but I'm so stoked at the possibility of seeing friends in Europe! Na shledanou!
Wednesday, March 31, 2010
Four Months and Counting
As uncomfortable as I am with the idea of people being able to read all my thoughts, hopes, and fears I realized that the benefit of me being able to look back at this time in my life and remember how it was would far outweigh any level of discomfort. So here I am, less than four months away from moving to Prague to take the TEFL course and begin teaching English. It's a strange feeling having this move be so close but still feel so far away. I'm itching for the next phase in our lives and I'm elated that this is it. Really, any change would be welcomed. For the past two years I've been spinning my wheels as a substitute teacher knowing that I was meant for something else, that this wasn't going to be my "thing." I'm not sure what my area of expertise will be, but God I hope it's not teaching. I know this sounds strange coming from someone who's excited to be moving away to teach. It's something that I know that I can do, and I'm pretty good at it so far. It just doesn't spark that passion in me that I refuse to live without.
So for the next two months I will continue to spin my wheels until the school year ends. After that, I can't even fathom what my life will look like. There are so many unknowns with our situation that I've come to the realization that I can't freak out about the unknown. Which is not to say that I don't freak out, I just try to remember every day why I am not supposed to. The top four things that make me nervous right now are as follows. 1. We have no idea how long we are going to be living in this house, it all depends on the sale. 2. We don't know where our stuff is going to be placed during our time away. It will probably stay with my sister in her storage or with my mom, but both of their whereabouts after the summer are also up in the air. 3. I don't know if we will be able to find jobs for the two months between the end of the school year and our move, which will affect how much money we save. 4. If this whole thing falls through and we have to come home, we will both be unemployed and trying to find work like the rest of America.
But enough with the negativity. I really do have an overall peace about the situation. I feel like we were meant to do this, and that's a pretty amazing feeling. I'm not quite sure how to prepare myself emotionally for this kind of trip because I have no basis of understanding of what it will be like. That actually makes it a lot easier. My world as far as my family goes is so much different this year than I ever thought it would be. I wish I could step back in time live in that place of security and stability again. I know that it will never be the same, and in a way it makes it so much easier to leave. I wish that this element was a result of personal growth and not unforeseen circumstances but I will take the good with the bad.
The next step as far as planning goes is to book our flights from JFK to Prague. We have our trip to Pennsylvania planned and we will leave on July 27, 2010. Other than ordering some documents, most everything else has to be taken care of this summer. So for now, I keep spinning.
So for the next two months I will continue to spin my wheels until the school year ends. After that, I can't even fathom what my life will look like. There are so many unknowns with our situation that I've come to the realization that I can't freak out about the unknown. Which is not to say that I don't freak out, I just try to remember every day why I am not supposed to. The top four things that make me nervous right now are as follows. 1. We have no idea how long we are going to be living in this house, it all depends on the sale. 2. We don't know where our stuff is going to be placed during our time away. It will probably stay with my sister in her storage or with my mom, but both of their whereabouts after the summer are also up in the air. 3. I don't know if we will be able to find jobs for the two months between the end of the school year and our move, which will affect how much money we save. 4. If this whole thing falls through and we have to come home, we will both be unemployed and trying to find work like the rest of America.
But enough with the negativity. I really do have an overall peace about the situation. I feel like we were meant to do this, and that's a pretty amazing feeling. I'm not quite sure how to prepare myself emotionally for this kind of trip because I have no basis of understanding of what it will be like. That actually makes it a lot easier. My world as far as my family goes is so much different this year than I ever thought it would be. I wish I could step back in time live in that place of security and stability again. I know that it will never be the same, and in a way it makes it so much easier to leave. I wish that this element was a result of personal growth and not unforeseen circumstances but I will take the good with the bad.
The next step as far as planning goes is to book our flights from JFK to Prague. We have our trip to Pennsylvania planned and we will leave on July 27, 2010. Other than ordering some documents, most everything else has to be taken care of this summer. So for now, I keep spinning.
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